It's My Birthday Today by Caitlin Lee
Summary: It's Ginny's birthday and she goes out to buy a dress robe for herself and she has a few troubles along the way. Written completely from Ginny's point of view. This is my first fic and I'm feeling good about it. I hope you like it!
Categories: Completed Short Stories Characters: None
Compliant with: None
Era: None
Genres: Humor
Warnings: None
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: 3239 Read: 2822 Published: Aug 26, 2004 Updated: Aug 26, 2004

1. It's My Birthday Today by Caitlin Lee

It's My Birthday Today by Caitlin Lee
Today is my birthday. Most people get excited at the prospect of turning one year older. You become that much closer to be able to drink Firewhiskey legally, apparating when the chance of splinching yourself is minimal, and out of Hogwarts for good. As for me - well, it’s a day. One day out of over three hundred. Another day to remind me that I’m not special and I never will be.

Don’t even go there. I don’t need an advisor—I’m not depressed. I’m just very aware of myself. I’m confident in the things I do and who I am, and I manage to keep my head level and not let my emotions take over… most of the time. Because who wants to be friends with Weepy Eyes?

So why am I complaining? Oh I’m not, I’m merely stating the truth. I know I won’t get a “Happy Birthday, Ginny!” from anyone. Not even from what’s-his-face… Oh yeah, Dean - my useless boyfriend. “I’m especially sure I won’t hear it from Ron “Memory Like a Fish” Weasley.” Any friends, you ask? Friends are tricky business. I know from personal experience. They can know too much about you and then you are tied down - no, how about obliged - to be friendly with them. And even worse, you can know too much about them! Like the one time, Hermione decided to tell me all about her woes, Ron likes her but she doesn’t like him, she likes Harry but he doesn’t like her, (which I can totally relate to) and on and on… I thought my head was going to explode. If there’s anything I’ve learned from being the only girl with so many brothers that I can’t even count them on one hand, you should keep things bottled up, don’t let any one know what is going on inside your head, and play it cool. I learned that from Fred and George. Although, I must say, besides being brilliant jokesters, the rest of their brains are just stuffing. So I’m like them - not the stuffing part, the bottling up part. It’s no biggie if people forget my birthday. I just buy stuff for myself. Then again, Fred never forgets George’s birthday and George never forgets Fred’s. But that doesn’t count. So I can be better than them. I can do it on my own. That’s right, I am independent!
So I woke up and went to the Great Hall for breakfast. I always go early. I can avoid people and their gossipy conversations that way. Hasn’t Parvati learned not to tell Lavender anything? We all know about the time when Parvati was “accidentally” snogging Goyle, who she claims she thought was Seamus. Maybe I might have believed her; except that they got caught going at it in the dungeons by Malfoy. Apparently he has a very loud voice.

I sat down and ate breakfast. When I was about halfway through, a package came for me. Well I guess you could say that not everyone forgets my birthday. My parents usually don’t, but they can’t count - they have these little magical reminders that they wake up to everyday. For example: Charlie’s coming home today, or the garden needs to be de-gnomed again. Useless little reminders like that. I put my birthday on there myself.

Mum and Dad sent me money. Not much mind you; just enough for me to buy something for myself in Hogsmeade. They have no clue what to get me. Maybe I should put that on the reminders. I’ll have to remember that for next year - but I’ll probably forget.

By now, the Great Hall is filled with students that are doing last minute homework or revising for that forgotten quiz. There are always three types of students in the Great Hall really early. First, The Procrastinators - doing homework as soon as it is assigned to them is a foreign comcept. I really don’t understand why they leave it until the last minute. It’s not like they have anything better to do. Next we have The Over Achievers. Hermione falls into this group. No, wait - she founded this group. Always doing extra credit work, all the bloody time. Finally there is the group that I fall into. The Loners. Or wait, no - maybe The Early Risers. Or maybe Just the People Who Enjoy a Little Quiet Time By Themselves Every Once and Awhile. Yes, that is the title. Okay, sure - some of us are loners. But I’m not. I have friends, but sometimes - actually most of the time - they drive me up the wall. Honestly, I have no interest in who is the cutest boy, who is a tart, and who snogged who. I’ve had my fill of that. Bleh, especially after having a crush on Harry for way too long.

Anyways, today is Saturday and it’s a Hogsmeade weekend. I always find it really funny when stupid people from The Procrastinators, like Crabbe or Goyle, are doing homework, thinking that they have school again today. What morons. Anyways, I usually go with Sarah or Colin. They are fairly normal, except for Colin - I think he’s a little too obsessive. And Sarah does have this thing about Fire Salamanders that I have never understood. But I’ll go in alone today. Then I can buy something for myself without the opinion of anyone. Maybe I’ll get some dress robes - and then I might look a little like a girl. Yes. I will get some dress robes, and I will do it all by myself.

I walk in to Hogsmeade alone. It’s kind of nice being alone - you notice more around you without ugly people blocking the beautiful scenery. But then, ugly people do block ugly scenery. Like Mopsy’s yard. She has way too many dogs to have a nice clean yard. Yuck! She is a nice lady, just not all together in the head.

So dress robes shops. Hmm… this where girls like Lavender are actually useful. They know this kind of stuff. I guess I’ll go into one, and then… how do you look for clothes? Oh drat, I have no idea what I’m doing. But I vow to myself to do this alone! I am an independent woman, which means that I can buy clothes for myself, even if they don’t look good. But who cares about looking good? Wait, who am I to lie to myself? I wish I could look good. I just get too frazzled with things like “colour scheming” and “bring out my eyes,” or ridiculous things like “highlighting the goods.” I don’t have any goods, thanks to Quidditch.

Ok, so the first store is called… oh wait, I run outside and check the name of the store again, and it’s… why the heck am I in a store called Magical Fashion Discounts? Ahh! Must exit premises quickly! Don’t worry, sir! I’ll escort myself out, thank you very much! Even Mum doesn’t go in there. That would have been a disaster, and it’s good thing I came out just then. That Ravenclaw seventh year hottie is coming down the street. Wait, why do I care? And so what if he’s hot and he sees me in this store that smells like the Hufflepuff common room? Oh right - because then not only would I look like a fool, I’d smell like one too. Well, this has been an excellent shopping experience. Perhaps I should really call it quits. No. I vowed to myself that I would buy a dress robe! I can do it.

Ok next store - I’ll just pretend I actually looked in the first one. I can fool myself if I try, right? I’m walking down the street looking for another clothing store, clothes… clothes… Oh Zonko’s! I should really buy more Dungbombs. I wasted so many planting them in the boy’s toilets. I should’ve realized that they don’t even notice the difference between Dungbombs and the real thing, how disgusting. No, wait - I must resist the temptation of purchasing something that I can put to good use. Must buy useless dress robes! Gladrags Wizard Wear - people usually go into this one, so I think I will too.

I’m just looking around and I walk over to a rack where some robes are hanging. They look plain; kind of like what I would want to wear. I’m rummaging through them, not really knowing what I’m looking for, when I spy one that looks okay. It’s dark green and very plain.
“Are you shopping for someone, Miss?” I turn around and see a sales lady looking at me curiously. What? Is it a crime for me to shop for dress robes?
“No, I’m buying dress robes for myself.” I turn back to look at the selection I’ve made and this old bag is still there.
“Would you like some help though, Miss?”
“Umm, no…” I replied. “I think I can handle this myself.”
“Well, if I could make a suggestion.” The nerve of her! Can’t a person do anything by themselves?
“Sure,” I tell her as politely as I can, which wasn’t very.
She lowers her voice and says quietly, “You might want to try looking at the dress robes that are designed for women.” Oh. Bloody. Hell. I knew I should have asked Sarah to come with me. Might as well face my doom with my head held high. Or wait - maybe I can wriggle out of it.
“Did I say for myself? I mean for my boyfriend. So sorry, I wasn’t really listening, you see. So caught up in the wonderful men’s selections over here. Just Lovely. But now that you mention it, yes, I think I would like to look at some dress robes for myself.” Smooth Ginny, very smooth. Next I’ll be telling porkies like I was Lockhart’s apprentice. The sales lady guided me to the other side of the store, which for some reason I hadn’t even noticed at all… Brilliant. But even less brilliant are these women’s dress robes. I think I belonged on the men’s side. Bleh! Frills and bows galore, my nightmare come true! Oh, what have I gotten myself into? Ok… maybe if I ask for some help…
“Umm, excuse me,” I say to the woman who has temporarily made my life a total embarrassment.
“Are you needing assistance?” She asks. Do I detect a little bit of mockery? Hmph!
“Well, perhaps a little. I’m just overwhelmed by all the selection, and I don’t know exactly what I’m looking for. If you can believe it, this is the first time I’ve gone shopping for myself.” Might as well come out with all of it, Ginny. But actually, she smiles! Yay! Perhaps she will be discreet and understand that I am shopping impaired.
“Ok, well what you want is something that accents your features. You have brown eyes and red hair. Red hair really limits your selection, but the colours you do have to work with will bring out your hair nicely, so don’t worry.” What!? Bring out my hair nicely? Don’t worry? Well yeah, now I’m worrying! I don’t know if I should trust this woman; maybe she’s got it in for me. Yeah, she’ll pick out the ugliest robe out of them all, tell me I look fab fabbity fab, and who am I to know the difference? That’s right, Ms. I Know All About Fashion. I know what’s going on in your dirty little mind.

She pulls this robe off the rack, and actually, it’s almost like the one I picked out on the men’s side. Point for Ginny! It’s a little more… flowy… though, if you will. And more revealing… that might be a problem. There’s really nothing to reveal.
“Green is a great colour that goes well with your hair and your pale complexion. Go try it on, and then come on out and we’ll see if it’s right for you.” I walk into the changing room feeling like a complete dingle-bat. I try it on and it’s a little too tight for my liking. How can I run in this contraption? I walk out nervously and show Ms. Green is a Great Colour. Oh wait; her name tag says Joanne. I guess that works, too. She smiles and nods approvingly.
“Well, that looks wonderful! Maybe you would like something a bit more feminine?” I don’t know what to say; what is meant by more feminine?
“Ok, but I really don’t like bows or frills, if that’s ok…” I don’t know if she heard me. She’s looking through the robes and she pulls out another one; it’s kind of a creamy colour. It has bows!
“How about this one, dear? This style has been fairly popular.” I think she just saw the disgusted look on my face. “No, then? How about you just try it on, and we’ll see? In you go!” I guess I really have no choice in the matter - especially when the matter is me buying things for myself! But I’ll try it on anyway. Ok, this one is just as tight as the other, if not tighter. Oh wait, yes it’s tighter - I didn’t do it up in the back.
“Are you going to come out, dear?” Joanne asks. I swear she’s just drooling out there, waiting for me to come out so she can have a good laugh. I walk out anyways, how much worse can it get?
“Oh! How lovely!” She exclaims. I finally say something,
“I don’t know. Do you have anything more – well, actually less? I was hoping for something plain.”
“Oh, but this one suits you so well. I’ll see what I can find.” She is rummaging again, and I feel like an idiot standing there in this stupid, ugly robe. She hands me the perfect robe - I know because it will baggy on me. It is plain and dark green, almost black. It reveals nothing. I know it is perfect. I try it on and walk out triumphantly. I’ll show you, Joanne! If that is your real name…
“Well, if that is the look you are going for then it suits you well.” She isn’t smiling; I can tell she’s not happy, and that makes me happy. I won! Yes!
“Yes, I think I will get this one,” I tell Joanne rather happily. She nods.
“If you’re sure, then.”
“Sure I’m sure, it’s perfect.” I’m still looking in the mirror, pleased with myself.
“Alright then, I’ll be waiting for you at the cashier’s desk.” Joanne turns and leaves, defeated by my superb shopping abilities. I knew I could do this without anyone - well, almost without anyone. Anyways, I know I still win. I am fabulous. On the way back to the dressing room I spy an interesting looking robe, the exact opposite of what I have on now. It is black - black silk, to be precise. Holy smokes! It’s so small and revealing! Hee hee! It’s almost too funny for words. I should just try it on so I can have a laugh. I grab the robe and run into my dressing room, where I try and get it on but it’s kind of tight. Wait… if I wiggle like this… excellent. I’ve got it on. Okay – oh, no. The mirror is outside my dressing room. I’ll just transfigure this coat peg into a mirror. Well, great! It works perfectly, but I bet it would work even better if I were only two inches tall! How come it isn’t bigger? Ok, engorgement charm. How does it go again? Oh drat, I forget. Maybe it was Engorian! Ahh! Stop it quickly! What do I do? What do I do? Oh right! Finite Incantatem! Well, that would have made my day complete - a mirror with a mouth that eats dress robes. Great, I still have a tiny mirror. Perhaps I should just run out and look and run back in.

I look like a dork. Excellent. Perhaps I should take a picture and document this moment for all to see. But where did these goods come from? I don’t recall having them before. Oh no, someone is coming! I turn around and go back to my dressing room. Oh no, my door is locked! I’m trapped in a stupid robe and I can’t get back in, and someone is going to see me! Oh, woe is me! Ok, I’ll just not look at them, and they won’t look at me. Perfect plan.
“Wow.” I hear this guy give a whistle and then say, “Hey, what’s your name, babe?” What? Is some guy coming on to me? Some guy is coming on to me… Oh my god! Some guy is coming onto me! Victory! I turn around.
“Why thank—AHH!” I scream and flail and bolt back to my door. THUD! “Ow!” Darnit! I forgot my door was locked. Great, Malfoy was coming onto me. Malfoy was coming onto me…Hee hee! Malfoy came onto me! I laugh out loud. He appears to be too stunned to do anything. Oh, this day is shaping up to be better than I thought.
“I’m sorry Malfoy, I didn’t quite catch what you said. Could you repeat it again?” I grin. Again he appears to be too stunned to say anything. “Malfoy?” Hmm… I’m started to get worried; did I accidentally petrify him?
“Ferret boy! Wake up!” There we go… He is alive, ladies and gentlemen - no need to worry—or rejoice. He’s shaken his head in disbelief. He turns to leave and he’s mumbling something. Something like, wait, can’t quite hear it…
“Weasley… never look good… how… hottie… don’t get…” And Ginny scores another point, bringing her total up to two! Joanne and Malfoy: Zero! Malfoy has left the store and I’m feeling quite good. Hmmm… if this robe has this effect on Malfoy, what effect will it have on the rest of the male population of Hogwarts? Perhaps I should purchase this robe instead. A novel idea, Ginny my dear.

I walk to the cashier’s desk where Joanne is and I say, “I’ve changed my mind, I hope that’s okay.”
“Of course it is. Actually I’m glad you did; that other robe did nothing for your figure.”
“Apparently.” I smile happily and leave the store with my newly purchased dress robe.


The End!


A/N: I'd really appreciate it if I could get a few reviews with some suggestions or comments, seeing as this is my first fic, so take a minute and tell me what you thought! Thanks a bunch. :)
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