"She's what?" Draco said, his eyes widening.
He watched Pansy's hands tremble as she turned to face him. Her eyes were not beautiful anymore, but dark and empty. She looked so tired, too, like she hadn't slept for days.
"Dead," she said quietly, her voice quivering. "She's dead, Draco." Her lips twisted. "She killed herself because I wasn't on her side anymore. Because I took your side. She killed herself and it's all my fault."
Ginny put an arm around her shoulders. "No, it's not. What she did, that was her choice. Something was wrong with her. You had nothing to do with this, Pansy."
Breath seemed to escape her as she answered the redhead. "You're right, this isn't my fault. It's not my fault at all. It's yours. The two of you. If you two hadn't gotten together, none of this would have happened."
She stood and walked to the door. Draco was behind her in seconds, his arms around her shoulders. He pressed into her back and spoke softly into her ear.
"You're looking to place blame," he said. "Because the reality is much worse. You have to face it or you're never going to get through this."
Pansy shut her eyes, her hands pressed against the door. "I can't," she whispered. "She was my friend and I didn't see that part of her. She was alone and I never knew it."
Tears shook her body as she turned and pressed into Draco's chest. He hugged her tightly and let her cry while Ginny make tea, knowing that it ultimately would do nothing.
You could never heal a wound like this with anything but time, patience and acceptance. And anyone who says they're fine without those things, that they just needed to be by themselves, was lying.
Death was everywhere – you either had to deal with it head on, or you'd be lost in a crippling darkness that if you didn't find a way out, you'd never see the sun again.
**
"She's finally sleeping," Draco said. It was almost dawn by the time Pansy stopped crying. He leaned against the counter. "What the hell are we going to do?"
"I don't know," said Ginny. She shook her head. "I wonder if Blaise knows."
"Probably not," Draco muttered, pulling her toward him. He kissed the top of her head. "I wonder how he'll react. I mean, he didn't really like her, that's what he said."
"Death changes people," Ginny told him. "You should go talk to him. He needs to know."
He nodded and grabbed his coat, then kissed her softly. "I love you," he whispered. "I'll be back soon."
When Draco failed to find Blaise at his flat, he tried several of the local pubs. Even though it was barely noon, he knew his best friend like the back of his hand. He'd stayed out all night drinking and would only resurface when he wanted to be found.
As Draco headed back to Ginny, he passed a pub. It was a little one that he'd barely noticed but it didn't look like it would be the type of place his friend would go.
Suddenly the door to the building opened, and an angry voice said, "If you ever come in here again, you'll regret it."
A thud of a body falling to the ground. A groan and a bitter, "Yeah? I'd like to see you try."
Even though the man was slurring, Draco knew that voice. He turned around to see Blaise sprawled on the concrete, his cheeks flushed and his eyes narrowed. Draco approached him and knelt down.
"Are you okay?"
Blaise's eyes flickered to him. "I'm fine," he said, struggling to stand. "Did you hear about Daphne?"
Draco nodded.
"It's great, isn't it?" Blaise asked, giving a lopsided smile.
Draco could hardly believe what he was hearing out of his friend's mouth. Surely even a drunken Blaise knew what he was saying was wrong?
"Why are you talking like that?" Draco asked, frowning. "She died, mate. This is not a good thing, no matter how you see it."
Blaise's smile dropped and his whole expression changed. "She what?" he asked, his voice tight. "She's dead?"
Draco's eyes widened. "Pansy didn't tell you?"
"All she said was Daphne wasn't here anymore." Blaise put his hands in his hair and pulled. "I thought she left town. God, I can't believe this. What happened?"
Draco hauled his friend up. "I'll get you some coffee and we'll talk about it. Come on."
**
After they got coffee and talked, Draco brought Blaise back to the flat. When they walked in, Ginny was sitting on the couch with Pansy, who had a blanket over her shoulders and was drinking a mug of tea.
He knelt down in front of her and buried his head in her lap. "I'm sorry," he said as she curled her fingers in his hair. "I'm so sorry. Are you alright?"
"No," Pansy said tiredly. "I'm not alright."
Blaise lifted his head and kissed her softly, his hands on her shoulders. "You'll get through this," he whispered.
Pansy closed her eyes, willing the tears away. With Blaise's lips against hers again, for a second she felt normal. She felt like nothing had happened. Then someone cleared their throat and the whole world came back at full speed.
"Pansy, would you like to stay here for a few days?" Draco asked. "It's the least we could do."
"I was going to stay with Blaise," she said, shaking her head. "We're kind of seeing each other. But thank you."
Draco didn't even react, he only nodded. "If you need anything, let us know. We'll come by."
Pansy stood, gripping Blaise's hand. "I know all of this is weird, but stranger things have happened. You know how that is," she said, glancing at Ginny with a faint smile.
Draco hugged the dark-haired girl. "Just take care of yourself," he whispered. "Don't hesitate if you need something."
Once they were gone, Ginny slipped her arm around Draco's waist and leaned against his chest. He smiled to himself and played with a strand of her hair.
"Do you think she'll be okay?" she asked.
"I hope so," he answered, staring at the closed door.
He watched Pansy's hands tremble as she turned to face him. Her eyes were not beautiful anymore, but dark and empty. She looked so tired, too, like she hadn't slept for days.
"Dead," she said quietly, her voice quivering. "She's dead, Draco." Her lips twisted. "She killed herself because I wasn't on her side anymore. Because I took your side. She killed herself and it's all my fault."
Ginny put an arm around her shoulders. "No, it's not. What she did, that was her choice. Something was wrong with her. You had nothing to do with this, Pansy."
Breath seemed to escape her as she answered the redhead. "You're right, this isn't my fault. It's not my fault at all. It's yours. The two of you. If you two hadn't gotten together, none of this would have happened."
She stood and walked to the door. Draco was behind her in seconds, his arms around her shoulders. He pressed into her back and spoke softly into her ear.
"You're looking to place blame," he said. "Because the reality is much worse. You have to face it or you're never going to get through this."
Pansy shut her eyes, her hands pressed against the door. "I can't," she whispered. "She was my friend and I didn't see that part of her. She was alone and I never knew it."
Tears shook her body as she turned and pressed into Draco's chest. He hugged her tightly and let her cry while Ginny make tea, knowing that it ultimately would do nothing.
You could never heal a wound like this with anything but time, patience and acceptance. And anyone who says they're fine without those things, that they just needed to be by themselves, was lying.
Death was everywhere – you either had to deal with it head on, or you'd be lost in a crippling darkness that if you didn't find a way out, you'd never see the sun again.
"She's finally sleeping," Draco said. It was almost dawn by the time Pansy stopped crying. He leaned against the counter. "What the hell are we going to do?"
"I don't know," said Ginny. She shook her head. "I wonder if Blaise knows."
"Probably not," Draco muttered, pulling her toward him. He kissed the top of her head. "I wonder how he'll react. I mean, he didn't really like her, that's what he said."
"Death changes people," Ginny told him. "You should go talk to him. He needs to know."
He nodded and grabbed his coat, then kissed her softly. "I love you," he whispered. "I'll be back soon."
When Draco failed to find Blaise at his flat, he tried several of the local pubs. Even though it was barely noon, he knew his best friend like the back of his hand. He'd stayed out all night drinking and would only resurface when he wanted to be found.
As Draco headed back to Ginny, he passed a pub. It was a little one that he'd barely noticed but it didn't look like it would be the type of place his friend would go.
Suddenly the door to the building opened, and an angry voice said, "If you ever come in here again, you'll regret it."
A thud of a body falling to the ground. A groan and a bitter, "Yeah? I'd like to see you try."
Even though the man was slurring, Draco knew that voice. He turned around to see Blaise sprawled on the concrete, his cheeks flushed and his eyes narrowed. Draco approached him and knelt down.
"Are you okay?"
Blaise's eyes flickered to him. "I'm fine," he said, struggling to stand. "Did you hear about Daphne?"
Draco nodded.
"It's great, isn't it?" Blaise asked, giving a lopsided smile.
Draco could hardly believe what he was hearing out of his friend's mouth. Surely even a drunken Blaise knew what he was saying was wrong?
"Why are you talking like that?" Draco asked, frowning. "She died, mate. This is not a good thing, no matter how you see it."
Blaise's smile dropped and his whole expression changed. "She what?" he asked, his voice tight. "She's dead?"
Draco's eyes widened. "Pansy didn't tell you?"
"All she said was Daphne wasn't here anymore." Blaise put his hands in his hair and pulled. "I thought she left town. God, I can't believe this. What happened?"
Draco hauled his friend up. "I'll get you some coffee and we'll talk about it. Come on."
After they got coffee and talked, Draco brought Blaise back to the flat. When they walked in, Ginny was sitting on the couch with Pansy, who had a blanket over her shoulders and was drinking a mug of tea.
He knelt down in front of her and buried his head in her lap. "I'm sorry," he said as she curled her fingers in his hair. "I'm so sorry. Are you alright?"
"No," Pansy said tiredly. "I'm not alright."
Blaise lifted his head and kissed her softly, his hands on her shoulders. "You'll get through this," he whispered.
Pansy closed her eyes, willing the tears away. With Blaise's lips against hers again, for a second she felt normal. She felt like nothing had happened. Then someone cleared their throat and the whole world came back at full speed.
"Pansy, would you like to stay here for a few days?" Draco asked. "It's the least we could do."
"I was going to stay with Blaise," she said, shaking her head. "We're kind of seeing each other. But thank you."
Draco didn't even react, he only nodded. "If you need anything, let us know. We'll come by."
Pansy stood, gripping Blaise's hand. "I know all of this is weird, but stranger things have happened. You know how that is," she said, glancing at Ginny with a faint smile.
Draco hugged the dark-haired girl. "Just take care of yourself," he whispered. "Don't hesitate if you need something."
Once they were gone, Ginny slipped her arm around Draco's waist and leaned against his chest. He smiled to himself and played with a strand of her hair.
"Do you think she'll be okay?" she asked.
"I hope so," he answered, staring at the closed door.
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