Dreams following me Whispering to me Playing along my skin, Reminding me of what I have done Retelling the tale again and again Of my weakness- My choice- My betrayal to all that I had known, All for the touch of soft flesh against mine The chance to wake And see fiery locks spread Around the pillows For forbidden kisses In dark corridors, And stolen whispers That declare an undying love
And when I walk to my death, The death she doesn’t know of, The death I gave myself When I made my choice, I will be happy- For I had something perfect, Something angelic, That I loved And was loved back by: She whom I cannot bear to tell, Whom I cannot look at As I walk away for the last time
And then she is there, Before me, and I have to look. Her smile haunting me, The touch of her soft hand on my shoulder- That one act of kindness, That one moment of beauty, That whiff of something fragrant- It lifts my soul, Rending my eyes with briny tears That hauntingly kind look, amid failure and sadness And guilt and blame- That one smile Like she knows
and she takes my hand in hers and walks with me towards the door towards our death and then I know that she had seen this all along and her step never falters- not even when met with my father's cool gray eyes so like my own- for as we exit this corporeal world, we enter eternity together